If Democrats weren’t Wieners, Obama Would Have it Locked Up (or “Why I’m Endorsing Hillary Clinton”)
You heard me right. Now, I’m no fan of Clinton or Obama (or Osama, or McCain, or Kennedy for that matter), but Obama deserves to have this thing wrapped up. Here’s why: The Democrats system of allocating delegates is girly and un-American. Recently Obama won a state by nearly 20 percent. He got 17 delegates from that state, Clinton got 15. Clinton got 15 delegates for being blown out.
The Democrats set up a system where they reward losing. I suppose it should come as no surprise, since they’re always trying to prop up the lazy and worthless members of society. I’m by no means supporting Obama as a Presidential candidate (although he does make me all tingly when he speaks), but let’s give the guy his due. He has won a crapload of states. The superdelegates are likely to give it to Hillary anyway, which will cause the entire Democrat party to implode, which has great potential for being entertaining.
Of course, we all know that the Democrats’ philosophy involves taking money from working Americans and giving it to illegal aliens, losers, and criminals. To them, that’s “fair.” And hey, with the Republican’s track record the past 20 years, I’m starting to think there’s no difference there. That means the only thing left to do is either vote on social issues, or vote for whoever is the most entertaining person.
Obama is inspirational, but that isn’t interesting. McCain is boring AND messed up on his foreign policy. Clinton, in my opinion, gives us the most potential for laughter and scandal for the next 8 years, and in my book, scandal=interesting. Bill Clinton was a genius. He sat back while the economy roared along, fooled around with various and sundry ugly chicks, and collected his paycheck. He was frickin’ interesting to watch, and that’s why America loved him (and the fact he was a populist).
We are a generation in need of entertainment, so I’m officially changing my presidential endorsement to Hillary Clinton.
Wednesday, March 26th, 2008
