Monday, I finally broke down and ordered iPhones for Jenna and I. It doesn’t appear that Verizon is going to get the iPhone until they roll out 4G, which could still be a year or two. So, AT&T was the only option.

I ordered two 8GB iPhones (because I’m too cheap to pop for the 16 or 32), and they promptly shipped Jenna’s phone and backordered mine.

Needless to say, having my phone backordered (especially when Jenna’s was shipped immediately), did not make me happy. I called AT&T to get an ETA, and they told me they had no idea.

I went home and told Jenna and she said “you should call and threaten them.” It’s not really my style, but I did want my dang phone, so Tuesday morning I called again.

This time, I worked my way up to a supervisor. Here is a transcript of the conversation.

AT&T: Hello sir, I understand your iPhone was backordered and you need information about it’s ship date.

Pete: Well, yes, my phone was backordered, and I’m going to need you to go ahead and ship it out today.

AT&T: Unfortunately we are completely backordered on the 8GB iPhone, and I don’t know when they’ll be replenished.

Pete: Sounds like you have a problem there. I guess you’ll have to ship me a 16GB instead.

AT&T: I’m sorry, but I can’t change part of an order that’s already shipped.

Pete: I’m not interested in you changing my order. I just want someone to go down to the warehouse and put a 16GB iPhone in a box and ship it to me.

AT&T: Well sir, I don’t have the authority to do something like that, unfortunately.

Pete: Yes, that is unfortunate. I’ve been with Verizon for 14 years and I’ve never had a single complaint. I’m already unhappy with AT&T and I don’t even have my phone yet. I think I might have made a big mistake switching over, especially considering your 3G network is so much smaller than Verizon’s.

AT&T: Please hold for a moment.

Pete: No problem.

Eight minutes of total silence commence…………..

AT&T: Sir?

Pete: Yes?

AT&T: We have shipped you a 16GB iPhone at no extra charge. You should receive it on Thursday.

Pete: Thanks.

And that’s how that works.

Fred Phelps and his gay-bashing homies come to mind immediately. Those people are despicable morons who are undoubtedly all closeted gays themselves. Whenever I see him I just want him to shut up and go away. Society doesn’t like his message, and doesn’t like being subjected to it.

But the ACLU defends him. What the…?

Fred may be a hopeless moron, but it would be completely un-American to silence him. This country was founded on freedom (I thought) and that freedom includes LOUDLY stating your opinion, no matter how obnoxious, poorly thought-out, socially unacceptable, etc. their opinion happens to be.

The first group in modern times to have their freedom of speech infringed upon was anti-abortion protesters. Apparently it made people uncomfortable to see pictures of aborted babies before walking into a clinic to abort their babies. Politicians with the help of Planned Parenthood got legislation passed to prevent abortion protesters from standing within 500 miles of a clinic (I’m rounding there…).

But is that what WE, as Americans REALLY WANT?

Do we want one group of people to be able to shut up another group of people just because they’re the majority and they can?

That’s why for the past 8 years I stood by and listened as people bashed Bush, calling him a terrorist, traitor, baby-killer, racist, etc. I have listened to kooks like Fred Phelps rant and gay-bash. I have watched every major news outlet blatantly side with one candidate over another in political elections.

And you know what, I didn’t like it. But the last thing I would EVER want is for those people to shut up.

Yes, I’d like to change their minds about things, but that’s really not likely. I’d like them to choose to shut up and/or die, but that’s also not likely. So my alternatives are to villainize people for having an unpopular opinion and try to silence them, or I can point out the flaws in their argument and hope the general public is smart enough to separate the theatrics from the real content of the argument.

This health care bill that congress and Obama are trying to shove down our throats through raw partisan power and a massive PR campaign is, plainly put, the worst piece of legislation to ever have a serious shot at passing. I have about 100 reasons why, but if you don’t know by now that I’m a Libertarian then you haven’t been paying attention.

People are genuinely upset about this bill. Even if “big pharm” IS stirring people up about this issue, that doesn’t de-legitimize what the people are doing and saying. Remember, the “health care industry” as the politicians like to call it employs zillions of REGULAR Americans… not just doctors and nurses. I help manage a company that manufactures medical devices. I have a REAL LIFE stake in the implications of a government takeover of this sector. So do the hundreds of thousands of other people who work in insurance, medical offices, medical suppliers, medical manufacturers, medical research, etc. Not just doctors and nurses… secretaries, support staff, analysts, accountants, machinists, etc. etc. etc.

That doesn’t even begin to take into account the millions of small businesses that will be subject to higher taxes, which will inevitably result in LOW LEVEL workers being laid off. Duh.

“Big Pharm” and “Big Insurance” aren’t just these big monolithic corporations… they are collections of millions of US!

Kids, it’s time to grow up. This is America. In America, you work hard, you pay your own way, and you don’t rely on other people or the government to bail you out. Seriously. Grow up. There’s NO SUCH THING as a FREE LUNCH.

Didn’t your momma ever teach you that?

I was reading a Kansas City Star article about Gloria Squitiro’s journal being disclosed in court. It got me thinking about how our evidence rules in this country have gone horribly amok.

My first thought was “how the heck did anyone even get their hands on her diary?” And then my next thought was “did she actually voluntarily turn it over!?” Who knows. The article doesn’t say. The fact is, however, that her personal diary was being read in court.

That sounds just a little bit like self-incrimination, doesn’t it?

That’s not the point of this article, though.

How many times have we heard about evidence being suppressed because it was “improperly obtained”? It happens all the time. They will have the murder weapon smeared with the perp’s fingerprints and the judge will say “no, you can’t use it because the police collected it improperly.”

I realize the basis of these moronic rules is protection from illegal search and seizure. I get that. What I don’t get is how we can let someone OBVIOUSLY guilty off the hook because the police didn’t bag something correctly.

I propose that improperly obtained evidence should still be allowed in court. The officers who collected it improperly or searched illegally should be punished for their crime, but the guilty party should never get off the hook on a technicality.

Prior crimes by an individual are often suppressed during a new trial. So you may have a guy on trial that’s been convicted of rape 4 times and is now on trial for rape again… but for some reason we can’t tell the jury? It seems to me that is some pretty important background information!

We’ve gotten so hung up on protecting the rights of the accused, we’ve forgotten to protect the rights of the victims. It’s time to change the rules of evidence from something well-intentioned to something pragmatic and logical.

Many a person has written a book about how to get rich. Richness, you see, is a philosophy. It’s a way of living. People who are rich didn’t just wake up rich. They decided to be rich and then took action to become rich. That’s how it works.

You don’t see a lot of people writing books on the philosophy of being poor. Aside from Franciscan Monks, that is.

Being poor is just as much a decision as being rich. The difference is that, unlike richness, poorness is the default. If you don’t decide one way or the other, you will be poor.

But what if you want to be poor?

This is a paradox. If you have enough self-awareness and cognitive ability to consciously make that choice, then you aren’t merely a slob. Thus, you will have to take steps to insure your future poorness.

In case you fall into the hypothetical category of smart person that desires to be poor, I have assembled a set of steps to assist you.

1. Don’t put in any more effort at your job than the bare minimum to avoid being fired.

2. When you get your paycheck, cash it immediately.

3. Pay your rent, then spend the rest of your paycheck on something worthless and/or disposable (booze, drugs, rims, designer jeans, etc.).

4. Do not take care of your personal possessions.

5. When you’re not at your job, go to the bar or club and drink.

6. By all means, don’t read any books or take any classes.

7. Never watch national news or politics… only local news.

8. Make sure to only spend time with other people who desire to be poor (or are by default).

9. When you see people who have lots of money, assume they were just lucky.

10. Vote Democrat.

Everyone is selfish sometimes. Sometimes I simply decide I’m going to do what I want to do even if other people get upset. Last year I skipped the family reunion in St. Louis. The weather was questionable, I didn’t want to drive across Missouri, and I was tired. It was selfish of me to skip it, but I did anyhow.

I’m not talking about people who occasionally look out for numero uno. I think most people who know me would describe me as generous. A giver.

Real selfish people are selfish MOST of the time… if not all. They always put themselves first. They NEVER think to do something for someone else. They take and take and take and take. I’ve had friends who were selfish. I’ve been in relationships with selfish people. I’ve worked with selfish people.

They all suck.

The problem with being a generous person is that selfish people are drawn to you like moths to a flame. They suck the life out of you as long as you can, and about the time you start resenting their existence, they leave. Now, it’s partly my fault for allowing them to take advantage of my generosity. But it’s mostly their fault for being a selfish jerk.

The older I get, the more I loathe selfishness. When I see a kid acting narcissistic and selfish, I wanna slap them across the face. Parents who allow their kids to act that way are breeding the next generation of selfish adults.

Adults who only think of themselves or always put themselves first should be ashamed. If you’re past the age of 16 and you still act like an entitled brat, you’re not only a jerk, you’re lame. Other people are important, too. Other people deserve some kindness, too.

As my grandma always said…. “the world doesn’t revolve around you.”

Selfish people insist on having things their way. They don’t allow us generous people to just be generous. I naturally do things for people I care about. They don’t need to ask, or insist. The problem with selfish people is that whatever you do for them… it’s never enough. The higher you raise the bar, the more entitled they feel.

I hate selfishness more than I hate any other negative trait. An angry person can have good moments. A perv… well, they can be lots of fun. A moron… they can be sweet.

So here is my advice to all the selfish people out there: Grow the F up! What are you, 12? Stop taking all the time and start thinking about other people. Do you really want everyone you encounter to end up resenting you?! They will.

Sure as the Earth turns.

My line if thinking is far more advanced than that, and I think once you think about it, you’ll agree.

As citizens of the United States, we are all raised to believe that every individual is special and has a voice in how the country is run. On it’s surface, that sounds good, and we even have a political system that claims to do that through representative government.

However, the two party system has destroyed any chance of Joe Sixpack having any influence on the direction of the country (just as George Washington predicted).

That leaves three kinds of people.

First, there are the powerful. They aren’t necessarily rich, but chances are they came from money and bought their way into a position in government. These people have one agenda – stay in power. They are willing to do that by any means necessary. These days, all that requires is a good PR firm to market you. Yes, there’s a “struggle” between the two parties that constantly jockeys back and forth, but when was the last time you could tell the difference between a Republican and a Democrat? I don’t mean based on rhetoric – I mean based on their actions.

There’s no real difference, and that’s because both parties want one thing – to be in charge. He who is in charge gets to hold the country’s wallet. And that’s a pretty good gig. I wouldn’t want to give it up, either.

No one reading my blog is in the first category. People with that kind of power don’t care what the proletarians think.

That means you fall into one of the following categories.

There are the politically astute person without any power. That was me until recently. I thought if I educated myself and then educated others, engaged in grass-roots political action, etc. that I could impact the direction of the country… at least on a local level. I honestly believed I had a voice. Then I’d watch the news every day and it would make me angry, anxious, and generally disillusioned. It didn’t matter what logic and common sense dictated… the government did the opposite. It didn’t matter how much people in Washington lied (of both parties), they kept getting elected. It didn’t even matter that Washington politicians promised one thing and did the opposite. We blindly put them back into office over and over.

I finally realized that the first group of people have 100% of the power. It doesn’t really matter what the other 95% of the people in the country do, think, or fight for. It’s really moot.

That’s when I decided I need, for the sake of my own health, to move myself into category three.

These are the people who ignore politics altogether. They have a vague notion that we have a President who occasionally gets replaced, and if they can name him, they’re doing well. They don’t know how Barney Frank contributed to the mortgage meltdown while claiming it was George Bush. They believe everything the media spoon feeds them.

But what I realized is that the ignorant people and the powerful people are the only ones that are happy. Ignorance really is bliss, because there’s no downside to being ignorant of things that only have the potential to upset you, and that you can’t affect or control.

I was losing sleep over the crazy things people were doing in Washington. The lies they were telling, the hypocritical finger pointing. The double standards. It really did upset me.

About a month ago, I switched my radio away from the news and politics and put the dial on 610 Sports Radio. I stopped reading political news. I don’t even listen to the local talk show that focuses on Kansas City politics. I cut myself off completely.

And guess what… I’m happier, less stressed out, and less anxious.

I used to think it was awful that people were willfully ignorant. Now I know THEY were the smart ones all along.

I love it when polls come to brilliant conclusions like this one. First of all, if black people thought that Obama getting elected would end racism, that’s just stupid and naive. I realize that Savior Obama made a lot of promises and made a lot of legs tingle when he spoke, but Dr. Martin Luther King he is not.

Racism is a contentious issue in America, which never ceases to amaze me. I’m not going to use the cliche’ of “I have black friends….” argument (although I do), because that’s… well… cliche’. I’m still going to say it like I see it, because that’s how I roll.

There’s a financial component to racism. Poor whites and poor blacks tend to be more racist than financially secure whites and blacks. I’ve never seen a racist act, comment, or any kind of discrimination occur in Johnson County (KS)… well, aside from the police pulling over beat up cars with Missouri plates… It’s an affluent area with people of all races living here. Every person living in this county is an up-and-comer, and a vast majority of the people here worked hard to get there… they didn’t necessarily come from money.

If I drive to downtown Kansas City, MO, I not only get to observe racism, I can actually be a victim of it. See, that part of town is a poor, depressed ghetto, and that kind of environment breeds ignorance. If a black person were to drive to Kansas City, KS, they would undoubtedly experience racism there, because a lot of that area is made up of poor white people.

Racism is just a form of ignorance. Ignorance breeds ignorance. People who think “poor” (i.e. drop out of school, don’t work, etc.) are ignorant. We shouldn’t be surprised when they act like they’re ignorant, should we? Racism will always exist where the residents have given up hope for a better life. It’s simply a side effect of poverty and hopelessness.

The good news is, for those who decide to leave the life of ignorance, they can escape racism permanently. I know for a fact that (responsible) white people accept black people who are intelligent and hard working. I believe that black people accept white people who are intelligent and hard working, although I don’t want to put words in their mouths.

The key to ending racism isn’t electing a half black president. The key to ending racism, unfortunately, would be to end the “poverty culture” that perpetuates itself through things like welfare, drugs, gangs, and alcoholism.

Unfortunate because that’s a problem that can’t be fixed.

The Iranian government has promised to squash the protests by any means necessary but people are still pouring into the streets. You might call it the Iranian Revolution.

However, it’s completely pointless. The president of Iran is just a figurehead position, like being the queen of England. There’s no real power associated with the position. But unlike England, where the Parliament and prime minister have the real power, in Iran, the “supreme leader” has the power.

Regardless who prevails in the “election,” the supreme leader calls the shots. Period.

It’s a theocratic dictatorship.

The people can revolt all they want. It doesn’t amount to a hill of beans, because even if they get their guy, the supreme leader will tell him what to do. The puppet master. No matter what the ultimate choice, the people will get the same thing.

Trying to have a revolution in a Muslim country is one of the funniest and most pointless exercises I can imagine. Islam means “submission” and I’m pretty sure revolution doesn’t qualify as submission. At least not according to Webster.

The only way a revolt in Iran can work is if they overthrow the supreme leader and go to secular rule instead of religious. Not going to happen.

So go ahead and watch the news unfold. I’ll be right and you’ll be disappointed, but only you will have wasted your time following the story.

The Bible says the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, humility, and self control. In other words, if you are a Christian, people will be able to tell because you will exhibit these qualities. (NOT because you bash them over the head with a Bible.) Depending on the person, some or all of these can be a real battle. For me, patience was one I really had to learn. I had to find some sort of zen.

Some of those are not so easy for me… peace is the hardest one for me, as the anxious sort of person that I am. I’d argue that I’m pretty humble, but I’m afraid that self-contempt doesn’t qualify as humility. Not to mention the fact that saying you’re awesomely humble pretty much negates the point.

Even if you aren’t a Christian, these are some good things to aspire to. I don’t see how being kind could hurt you in life, for example. The only special point for Christians is that if you aren’t exhibiting these qualities at least to some extent, you might want to take a closer look at why.

As I forced myself to be patient, it became second nature to me. Now, when I’m standing there while someone does something annoying, I genuinely don’t get annoyed… most of the time. I’m not perfect. The point is, it’s not really a daily battle for me anymore.

With patience comes the realization that in this world, it’s a very rare quality. People are very impatient ALL the time. It happens in traffic, at the grocery store… anywhere there are people, there are annoyed people. It sticks out at me like a sore thumb, because I remember how unhappy I was ALL the time before I got my emotions under control (I went to Vulcan and studied with Spock).

When people are impatient with me, I tend to take it personally. I’m not really sure why that is… I’ll have to ask my therapist. If I can tell someone in traffic is freaking out, I try to make room for them. When someone’s freaking out at the store, I’ll let them go in front of me.

The only place I really still lose my cool is when I’m stuck on the highway behind an accident. I’m trying to work on that, but I haven’t conquered it yet. I know there’s nothing I can do about it, so I might as well sit back and relax… but then, emotions aren’t really rational.

My theory of patience relativity is that the more patient you are, the more you are sensitive to other people’s impatience. The inverse is probably also true… I’d venture to say that impatient people are both aware of…. and annoyed by…. people who are patient.

So next time you start to get annoyed with someone or something…. ask yourself “Does this thing I’m annoyed about matter jack freakin squat?” The answer is inevitably an emphatic “NO!”. You too can learn to be patient. It’s a skill, not an emotion.

Oh no, gas is up to $2.60 a gallon!

I know that I am abnormally intelligent, but does anyone else remember that gas prices have gone up every summer since Custer fueled up for his last stand? Many people fail to understand the most simple laws of economics, like supply and demand. People drive more in the summer, thus they use more gas, thus it costs more.

It’s not a vast conspiracy of collusion by oil companies. It’s not even seedy Wall Street speculators driving up the price because they’re trying to hedge against the housing bubble. It just happens. Every single year.

If you want gas prices to be lower in the summer, try taking your vacation in the winter. If half the people did that, at least the gas prices would stay consistent throughout the year even if it did make them a little higher overall.

It’s silly to panic over gas prices anyhow. The world didn’t come to an end last year when gas was $4.30 a gallon. We all just drove less or we spent less on entertainment.

The world isn’t coming to an end. Nobody’s trying to screw you.