People wondered why I thought I needed a concealed carry license… hmmm. Well, during the first year of my blog, I received 6 death threats via email, and one that came in the mail to my house. You’d carry a gun, too.

Obviously I take death threats seriously. I realize that there’s a 99% chance that the person is just a doofus trying to upset me, but that 1% chance makes it worth paying attention. I always report death threats to the police. Always before, it turned out to be some hapless moron from hundreds or thousands of miles away from where I live. Needless to say, the police take death threats fairly seriously as well. That’s good for me.

The latest death threat, however, turned out to be from someone I went to high school with. Yup, at the Christian school. Apparently he wants to kill be because I am not sad about Tiller’s untimely demise, and apparently me not being upset is judgmental behavior worthy of death.

I will refrain from pointing out the irony of that thought process.

Making terroristic threats is actually quite illegal, and even if you don’t mean it, you’re going to get in trouble. The fact is, no matter how well you think you’re hiding your tracks, you can’t cover up your online activity. Even the most novice website owner can track you down, so you can be sure that the police will have no trouble.

A few years ago, I had another blog site that I didn’t widely advertise. I was trying to be anonymous with it so I could “let my hair down” so to speak. I did give out the site to a few people, one of whom was quite judgmental (feigning shock) about the site. She claimed she had no interest in visiting the site, and then promptly visited the site using a craptastic proxy site called http://the-cloak.com.

This was quite amusing to me because the stats software I’ve been using on all my sites from the beginning detects proxy servers and shows the originating IP as well as the proxy IP. Being the nice guy I am, I never called her out, just shook my head in wonderment. People always assume I’m stupid, and some people even tease me about keeping stats on my sites. Little do they know how entertaining and useful it can be. I’ve since shut down that other site, by the way, so you can try to search for it, but it no longer exists.

Well, all that is to lead to the fact that the moron who sent the death threat last week used the same proxy site (the-cloak.com) to send it. The police didn’t even have to try hard to find the guy. I just downloaded the stats for them and they contacted the ISP. Total time spent tracking down moron: 10 minutes. I’m sure he thought his plan was fool-proof. Certainly, if my stats program couldn’t detect proxy IP’s, the police would have had the hassle of working with the-cloak.com, but even then… they would have found him.

I have no idea what’s going to happen to the moron, but I know it’s not going to look good on his resume’.

If we ignore the criminal element for the moment, I also have a pretty fair amount of idiots reading and commenting on the site. You know what I mean… the people who leave obnoxious insulting comments that generally display a complete lack of reading comprehension. Whenever I post something controversial, I always get at least one idiot hollering at me. They never address what I actually said, they just tell me I suck.

Those people are entertaining as well, because they usually get so offended they never come back (or they just lurk… and my stats package tells me THAT, too). I have had to ban a few repeat offenders over the years, but as I looked today, I realized there are only 4 banned IP’s on my server. Three of those 4 were from death threats. The fourth was someone who repeatedly tried to post comments giving out personal information about me.

The idiots are fun. The criminals, however, are not.

It started with a picture message from a 610 area code (unidentified person). The picture, without getting into details, was obscene.

A few minutes later, another text came through asking if she had received the picture. She replied that she had, and then asked who the heck he was.

He hemmed and hawed, and finally said his name was “Mark Jones.” Jenna doesn’t know a Mark Jones, so she pressed for more – “where do I know you from?”

“Mark” replied “We met at Jill’s party, we talked a lot but we never dated.”

Ok, right off the bat, that’s weird. Even if you are acquaintances that used to talk, why would you lead off your conversation with a dirty picture, especially several years later. Keep in mind Jenna has lived with me in Kansas since 2005.

When Jenna told him she didn’t know a Jill and she certainly didn’t know him, he replied again. This time he said “I sent the picture to a random number in my contact list on a dare, and if you reply with a dirty picture, I get money.” Obviously this is a perv scamming for pictures, so not to be outdone, she promptly found a dirty picture (of a man) and sent it to him. He replied saying that “that picture won’t get me paid.”

At that point, the fun was really over, because she obviously didn’t know him. She replied and told him that since she didn’t know him that he should delete her number from his phone.

We thought that would be the end of it, but alas, several hours later, he texted her again. This time, he said something derogatory about ME. Yes, ME.

Now, whether or not this guy has actually ever met Jenna will likely be a source of debate for many years to come, but one thing I’m sure is true – I’ve never met this guy. I only actually know 3 guys in Philly, and I know this wasn’t any of them. So the fact he decided to be derogatory towards me did not show a spirit of friendship.

Jenna replied (because she couldn’t resist) “whatever helps you feel better about yourself, Mike.”

Again, we thought that would be the end of it. He’d taken his bitter shot at ME, and he’d been asked to go away, so what else was there to say?

This morning, Jenna got another text from him. This one was cryptic, creepy, and weird. It simply said “So has Pete told you yet?”

Obviously he was just trying to bait her into another round of conversation, which at this point was like wrestling with a pig. He was getting lots of enjoyment out of harassing her, but it was no longer fun for her, it was scary.

Without further ado, I called Verizon and we changed her phone number.

What a creep.

It never ceases to amaze me the ends people will go to in an attempt to stalk people on the Internet. Sure, those of us that blog expect a certain level of weirdos reading and doing weird “Internet Stalker” stuff like sending thinly veiled threats via email, posting trolling comments, and in extreme cases, mailing weird and/or threatening letters to our homes. These types of incidents are somewhat disconcerting, but not anything I particularly lose any sleep over. As you also know, I take my 2nd Amendment rights very seriously, so I feel that anyone who chose to actually go through with a threat would meet an untimely demise.

However, as a Webmaster, I’ve witnessed an entirely unbelieveable level of Internet stalking, and some of my customers on IHS have been the victims. Many of the people who are my customers are also good friends, so that makes me doubly angry when it happens. Being a Webmaster, as it turns out, is basically a full-time job of tracking and banning weirdos from people’s websites, sending reports to ISP’s and in some extreme cases, to law enforcement officials.

I’m very grateful for the amazing help from the people at Google, who have been nothing short of spectacular at assisting with abuse investigations. I choose not to post any ads on any of my sites, but if I did, they’d be Google ads. I’ve also found that in most cases, ISP’s are very helpful as well.

The most disturbing trend, however, is the propensity for NON-strangers to be the perpetrators of Internet stalking. It’s almost always a jilted ex, a family member, or a “friend” doing the stalking. So, that’s pretty sad. People who are family or friends should just be absolutely ashamed of themselves. If they had the first clue about why people blog, they’d know that it’s for the community. It’s theraputic, and the blogging community as a whole are incredibly supportive and 99.99% of us follow the blogging code of ethics. Bloggers who decide to operate outside that unwritten code are quickly shut down.

But stalkers are never people who blog. Stalkers are always people with no clue… They feel powerful because they know about the blog and they can lurk without being noticed. They sit in judgment over each word they read, and feel that they have the right to control what’s said and what isn’t.

The latest stalking incident wasn’t someone stalking me. It involved several blogs, mine included, but was entirely focused on stalking one particular person. Steps have been taken, ISP’s have been notified of abuse, and a couple of sites have been closed down permanently as a result. Score one for the stalkers.

If you’re reading here because you’re entertained and/or you happen to be a friend, I’m glad you’re here… I’m not going anywhere. If you’re here from some creepy reason (you know who you are), why don’t you do us all a favor and drop dead.

Pete

And what we found was that we were accepted. Not by everyone, but by those with like interests and like minds. And readers materialized out of nowhere. And for the most part, they liked what we had to say, or were at least entertained. 99% of the comments are nothing but encouragement and healthy dialogue. Chicken soup for the soul, if you will.

And yes, many of us found that there were things about ourselves that we didn’t like, but were forced to acknowledge and face head on because of the public nature of our forum. Most of us learned from the experience, and we certainly all try to help each other through it all. I’ve found the level of care and support to be much higher in the blogging community than I have found in “real life.”

Most of the people that comment here are people I’d love to meet. Certainly all of the people on my “favorites” list. Is it crazy? Perhaps. But no more crazy than going to a bar or nightclub trying to meet people. This forum filters through all of the crap, and cuts to the chase. There’s a lot of fluff on blogs, but there’s also a lot of substance.

Only a person looking in from the outside could ever be a troll. Only someone so bitter and twisted that they’re afraid to expose their thoughts and claim them as their own.

The attack came from someone at my old employer. It’s funny, because 80% of the personal insults come from there. It’s impossible to know who posted it, because everyone there logs the same IP address.

I’ve threatened to report the abuse, I banned them for several months, and still they feel compelled to come back and try again.

There were people at my old employer that hated my guts. I can’t and won’t deny it. I’m sure at least a couple of them are even justified in their hatred. I’m certainly not perfect, and I had to make a lot of hard decisions that affected certain people.

I also worked there for nearly 9 years, and during the course of that time, I developed quite a few personal relationships. I dated people from work.

I’m quite confident I was one of the most gossiped about people there, and I’ll admit, (and never have before) that played a role in my decision to leave. I didn’t want to be somewhere that didn’t respect privacy, and that generated half-truths and un-truths on a regular basis.

I’m not so foolish or proud that I can say I didn’t get involved in the gossip chain. It happens. But I can honestly say I never made anything up. Despite what anyone there might claim, I did my best to do right by my employees and my friends.

The most vicious personal attacks I recieved from people at my old employer were people I barely knew. People that were loosely connected with me through a friend of a friend of a friend. All roads led to every road there, though. If I said something to anyone, it would end up in the rumor mill.

Sometimes I would make up crazy crap about myself and tell someone, just to see how quickly it got back to me, and to see if I could trace the rumor full circle.

As I discovered more and more about the rumor mill, I discovered that even in my closest circle of friends, I was not safe. I started to withdraw as much as I could, because I didn’t feel like I could trust anyone. I still believe I was justified in my feelings.

I bring it up, because I suspect that the latest attack was posted by someone that claims to be a friend. I could be wrong, because I can think of 10 people right off the top of my head that could have posted it. I just have a feeling.

I’ve written an extensive disclaimer, I’ve asked people to stay off the site, I’ve banned people, and I’ve broken off all contact with people at my old employer. I haven’t even talked to the people there in a year and a half. You’d think they’d get tired of harassing.

However, my theory is this: Their existence is so pathetic that it’s more entertaining to read about my life and throw rocks at it than it is to live their own lives.

So, once again, they are banned from viewing the site. I don’t feel bad about it, because frankly, they all need to get back to work and stop wasting time reading my site. I’m happy to just get along, but they can’t do it.

And that leads to the bigger issue. Why do people in cyberspace feel compelled to throw rocks at people. Is it the safety of anonymity? Are they just so pathetic that insulting someone who can’t defend themself is funny to them?

I will say this. One of the comments was that I should go back to writing about my lame existence. I have a lovely girlfriend, a great family, a career, most of an MBA, a nice house, a nice car, two nice dogs, and a cute cat.

If you think that’s lame, I’d love to hear about what you think makes your life so great.

And of course, the next time I receive a personal attack from there, I will be posting the name of the company, the name of the people I believe are responsible, and their titles, salaries, phone number, emails, and every bit of dirt I ever collected on them.

If they’re going to play dirty, so am I.

I believe there already is an unwritten code of ethics, and like many before me, I will try to put it into words right here and now. I was inspired by the latest troll attack on a friend of mine. It’s funny, I take it more personally when it happens to a friend than when it happens to me.

——————————————————

Pete’s Blogging Code of Ethics

1. I will not intentionally misrepresent the facts

2. I will always give attribution when I use materials written by, or published by someone else

3. I will respect the privacy of those I write about, by using their name and/or photos only with permission

4. I will treat respectful visitors with respect, and disrespectful visitors with a curt dismissal

5. I will be respectful of other bloggers whose sites I visit

6. I will defend any blogger who is attacked anonymously, regardless of the accuracy of the comments

7. I will never comment using an alias other than the one by which I am known

8. I will always leave contact information when I post a comment of disagreement

9. I will never use my blog as a tool to harm another person

10. I will always use due diligence to verify the facts of any article or comment I write

———————————————————–

Feel free to use this… just keep point 2 in mind if you do…

Pete